I recently read that the success rate in marriage today is about 25%. That means that 75% of marriages either end in divorce or are less than what God wants them to be. There are several different tragic storylines associated with this truth, but none more significant than the loss of souls. How are souls lost by the bad marriages? First, in any bad marriage, someone is sinning. One of the spouses are not measuring up to what God demands of them. The presence of sin in bad marriages is hinted at in 1 Peter 3:7 where Peter refers to prayers being hindered.
Secondly, souls are in grave danger when marriage ends in divorce because, at best, only one of the spouses have the right to remarry.
Matthew 19:9 (NKJV)
9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.
According to this passage, only the one who puts away his spouse for fornication can remarry. What happens to the spouse who is put away for fornication if he or she remarries? Jesus calls it adultery. Obviously, when one enters an adulterous marriage, his or her soul is in danger of being lost. The only solution is to repent and end the second marriage.
What about when a marriage is dissolved, and no fornication has been committed by either spouse? Then, according to Jesus, neither spouse can remarry without adultery occurring. Thus, both spouses are now in the very vulnerable position of giving in to the lust of the flesh and committing fornication or remarrying another person and entering an unlawful marriage.
Further complicating matters is that there are many false doctrines being taught that encourages remarriage by those who have no right to remarry. For example, there are those who teach that a person who has been put away for fornication can remarry. This position says, since the innocent party is no longer bound to the guilty party, the guilty party is no longer bound to the innocent party. If the innocent party can remarry, so can the guilty. The problem with that position is it does not consider the fact that in a marriage the husband and wife are not only bound to each other, they are bound to God’s marriage law (Romans 7:1-3). As a married man, I am bound, not only to Janice, my wife, but I am bound to God’s law which says I cannot divorce my wife, except it be for fornication, and remarry, without committing adultery. Now, if I commit fornication, my wife can put me away and be free from both the marriage to me and the bond of God’s marriage law, having, therefore, the freedom to remarry. However, while I would be loosed from the marriage (that is, the physical relationship to her, along with the marital responsibilities that attend it), I would still be bound to the law that says I cannot remarry. If I do, it is adultery. Any doctrine that contradicts this puts souls at risk. I encourage the reader to carefully read Matthew 19:9.
It is also being taught that a person who is married and divorced before he/she becomes a Christian can remarry after conversion. Those who teach this say that remarriage is possible because the person outside of Christ is not amenable to the law set forth by Jesus in Matthew 19:9. The truth is the alien sinner must answer to Matthew 19:9 just like the Christian. Jesus was simply setting forth His general law on marriage in Matthew 19:9. It would be applicable to all because Jesus is Lord of all (Acts 10:36). Jesus is not just Lord over those in the church, He is Lord of all. All power in heaven and on earth has been given to Him (Matthew 28:18). So, the question is, if the one who has not obeyed the gospel is not under the law that Christ has set forth, in what sense is Jesus his Lord? The doctrine that says that those outside of Christ are not accountable to the law of Christ greatly limit the Lordship of Jesus.
Another point that should be emphasized here is that if Matthew 19:9 is what has been called a “covenant passage,” and if non-Christians are not subject to the law of Christ, and therefore not amenable to the law set forth in Matthew 19:9, then it must be concluded that they are not subject to any part, piece or portion of the law of Christ. One cannot choose what portion of the law of Christ non-Christians are under and what portions they are not. Either they are amenable to all of it or none of it at all. Yet, this poses a problem because the command to repent and be baptized is a part of the law of Christ. If the non-Christian is not subject to the teachings of Christ on marriage, divorce, and remarriage, then he is not subject to the law that says one must repent and be baptized.
If one is unwilling to accept the consequences of his doctrine, he should give up the doctrine. The bottom line is this: Jesus directed His law on marriage to everyone who would ever get married (Matthew 19:9). Who does this law apply to? Jesus said “WHOSOEVER.”
There are many other doctrines that are now being espoused regarding remarriage that simply are not in harmony with the Word of God. Because of false teachers, and because of the emotional nature of the subject, the issue of divorce and remarriage can sometimes get sticky. But, when we cut through all the written and verbal rhetoric on this issue, we come to this conclusion: if you are in a second marriage and your previous spouse is still living, and fornication on the part of your spouse was not the cause of your first marriage being dissolved, you are living in an adulterous relationship and therefore in a state of sin.
Let us do our best to have the best marriages we can so that divorce never becomes a personal issue. However, let us also stand for the truth so that a terrible problem, that is, failed marriages, does not become an even worse problem, that is, adulterous unions that lead to the loss of souls.