Are you careful with your words?  You should be!  All of us should be because our words can condemn us before God.

Matthew 12:36 (ESV)
³⁶  I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak,

Your words matter.  How you speak to others is important, and it is not only what you say that is important, how you say it matters as well.  One of the first principles of Christianity is to love others (1 Corinthians 12:1-8).  Proper love will dictate how we talk to people.  Even when we are speaking the truth, love must be our motivation (Ephesians 4:15).

Avoiding the condemnation of an uncontrolled tongue takes discipline.  Paul wrote to the saints at Ephesus about being disciplined in their speech.

Ephesians 4:29 (ESV)
²⁹  Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

Paul was not setting forth a suggestion, he was giving an apostolic command to control our tongues.  He was speaking for Christ (Luke 10:16); thus, not using corrupt talk is a commandment of the Lord’s.  Since God never gives us a command we cannot keep, we know we can control what we say and do not say, we just have to think before we talk.  Paul tells us a few things we need to think about when talking to others.

We should think about whether our words are good for building up or not.  Are they going to be edifying for the one to whom we are talking?  This is not a question about making the one who we are talking to feel good, though our words should sometimes do that.  Building up someone, especially spiritually, might mean that we have to tell them something they do not like because it is in their best interest to hear it.  The point is, our words should help others, not hurt them.

When you are talking to others, think about the occasion.  Sometimes people need to hear certain things, but they need to hear them at the right time.  We must be disciplined enough in our speech that we do not just blurt things out that are not appropriate for the occasion.  For example, you tell your child not to run down the stairs.  Since children do not always do what their parents tell them to do (no matter how good the parents are), on one occasion your child runs down the stairs, trips, and falls, breaking an arm in the process.  As they cry out in agony, is that the right time to lecture them for ten minutes about obedience and not running down the stairs?  Of course not.  The time for that will come, but, at the moment, help is what is required.  That would not be the wrong time for verbal discipline.  Whenever we talk, we must always think about the occasion and make sure that what we are going to say fits.

We have the ability to control our tongues.  James three is a good commentary on this.  If we learn to do it, we are in good shape.  James said, “…And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body” (James 3:2).  If, on the other hand, we do not learn this lesson, and are undisciplined in our speech, our words will most assuredly condemn us.         

As you wind down for the night, think about these things.