Ephesians 5:15 (ESV)
¹⁵  Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise,

Friends are precious.  We are all blessed to have them.  However, there are good friends and bad friends.  Some are fair-weather friends; then, some friends are a constant part of our lives.  Solomon helps us to put friendship into perspective.

Proverbs 17:17 (ESV)
¹⁷  A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

This is what makes friendship so valuable.  Real friends love each other, and love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:8).  The love that Paul refers to is agape, and it is not just something felt or activated when someone else loves first.  It is an action taken because someone makes up their mind to love.  To agape is to always act in the best interest of others, even if the other person is an enemy (Matthew 5:44).

This is the kind of love that Solomon is referring to in Proverbs 17:17.  It is the kind of love that true friends have for each other.  This is why the Proverb says that a friend loves at all times.  It is the nature of real love.  The wonderful thing about having friends like this is that they are reliable.  When we need help, real friends are there.  When we make mistakes, real friends do not forsake us. When we disappoint our real friends, they forgive us.  This is the kind of friend that sticks closer than a brother (Proverbs 18:24).  Do you have real friends in your life?  If so, thank God.  If not, maybe it is because you have not chosen your friends wisely.  We need help to walk wisely sometimes, and picking the right kind of friends can do just that for us.

Walking wisely, however, involves not just having good friends, but being a good friend to others.  Are you a real friend?  Do you forgive and forget?  Do you lend a hand to those who call you friend when they are in need?  Do you love those you call friends no matter what? If we are real friends, we can honestly answer yes to these kinds of questions.

Local churches need members who are friends—brethren who always love each other.  To cultivate good friendships with brethren is wise living.  Yes, there are going to be disagreements among us.  There are going to be times when we make one another mad.  That is just the nature of relationships.  However, we must let brotherly love continue (Hebrews 13:1).  The closer we are as brethren in a local church, the stronger that local church is going to be.

I often talk about the importance of atmosphere when it comes to relationships.  For example, we must have an atmosphere of love and kindness in our homes.  Over the years I have talked to many couples who were on the verge of divorce.  It is always amazing to me what husbands and wives fight over in marriage.

There have been times when my wife, Janice, and I have listened to couples having a meltdown over something petty.  It might be something that has occurred in our marriage as well, but we simply shrugged it off as no big deal.  Now, why is it that something can be no big deal to us, but a major catastrophe to other couples?  ATMOSPHERE!  There has always been an atmosphere of love and respect in our home.  Thus, little things do not turn into major problems in our relationship.

When a home is filled with hostility, anger, even hatred, little things quickly turn into major things.  The atmosphere is important, and it is important in local churches as well.  Just like in a bad marriage, when a local church is filled with hostility, little things can quickly turn into major problems, destroying the local church.  What is the solution for this?  It begins with brethren developing strong friendships.  When a local church is made up of real friends, there is an atmosphere of love that reflects Christ, and the local church can prosper.  Are you helping your local church have a loving atmosphere?  Are you doing your part in cultivating friendships within the local church that can help it be the church Jesus wants it to be?  If so you are walking wisely, for that is not only best for the church, it will help you tremendously as well.

As you wind down for the night, think about these things.